Slow Is The
New Fast

The world's slowest mammal on Solana's fastest blockchain. Taking it easy, one block at a time.

Slothana Mascot
Taking a 3-second nap...

CONTRACT ADDRESS

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The SLOTHANA Philosophy

While everyone rushes to make quick profits, we embrace the "slow and steady" approach.

Fastest Blockchain

Solana processes transactions at lightning speed, but who says you need to move that fast? SLOTHANA brings balance.

3-Second Naps

Between transactions, our community takes micro-naps. It's scientifically proven to enhance decision making.* *Not actual science

Mindful Investing

SLOTHANA holders don't FOMO or panic sell. We meditate, contemplate, take a nap, and then perhaps make a move. Or not.

Sloth in rainforest
Mini sloth

The Birth of SLOTHANA

In a world obsessed with speed, SLOTHANA was created as an antidote to the frantic pace of crypto trading.

Our founder, a former high-frequency trader, had a revelation while watching a documentary about sloths: these creatures have survived for 64 million years by doing everything slowly and deliberately.

SLOTHANA combines the blazing fast Solana blockchain with the wisdom of Earth's slowest mammal to create a new paradigm: mindful meme investing.

64M Years of wisdom
0.03 MPH top speed
18 Hours of sleep

Tokenomics

Slowly and steadily distributing value to our community.

Sloth face
Community 50%
Liquidity 30%
Team 10%
Marketing 5%
Sloth Fund 5%

Token Distribution

Community 50%
Liquidity 30%
Team 10%
Marketing 5%
Sloth Conservation Fund 5%

Token Details:

  • Total Supply: 1,000,000,000,000 SLOTHANA
  • Transaction Fees: None (we move slow enough already)
  • Initial Liquidity: Locked for 6 months (sloth years)

Sloth Meditation Techniques

Each price milestone unlocks a new sloth meditation technique for our community.

$0.01

The Hanging Sloth

Hang upside down from your chair (mentally) and let go of all FOMO for 3 minutes. Notice how your trading anxiety dissolves.

UNLOCKED
$0.05

Slow Leaf Munching

Chew each bite of food 30 times while checking your portfolio. This prevents impulsive selling during price volatility.

COMING SOON
$0.1

The Three-Toed Breathe

Breathe in for 3 seconds, hold for 3 seconds, breathe out for 3 seconds. Repeat 3 times whenever crypto FUD appears.

COMING SOON
$0.5

Rainforest Canopy

A guided visualization where you climb to the top of the crypto market without rushing, enjoying the view along the way.

COMING SOON
Meditating sloth

Slothana NFT Meditation Cards

At $1.00, we'll release a limited collection of NFT Meditation Cards. Each card contains a unique sloth position and meditation guide to help holders maintain their cool during market volatility.

  • Unique meditation audio recorded at 0.25x normal speed
  • Weekly meditation challenges with $SLOTHANA rewards
  • Access to the "Zen Den" - our exclusive holder community

The Slowmap

Unlike other roadmaps, ours doesn't rush. We'll get there when we get there.

PHASE 1 - COMPLETED

The Great Awakening (Very Slowly)

Unlike other tokens that launch without warning, we announced our token three weeks before launch, giving everyone plenty of time to take several naps before deciding to join.

  • Token contract deployed with careful code review
  • Liquidity added and locked for 6 months
  • Community channels established
1
Phase 1
PHASE 2 - IN PROGRESS

Community Hibernation

Building a community that values patience over panic. Our Discord features "slow mode only" channels where you must wait 3 minutes between messages.

  • 10,000+ sloth enthusiasts gathered
  • Daily meditation sessions hosted
  • Sloth Sanctuary partnership (in very slow negotiations)
2
Phase 2
PHASE 3 - UPCOMING

SlothFi: Relaxed DeFi

Introducing finance at sloth speed. Our staking protocol has a minimum 3-month lock period because good things come to those who wait.

  • Launch SlothStake - with "forced patience" rewards
  • Sloth NFT collection with utility in ecosystem
  • Community governance (with 72-hour voting periods)
3
Phase 3
PHASE 4 - EVENTUALLY

Global Sloth Domination (Slowly)

By the time other meme coins have come and gone, we'll still be here, gradually climbing up the charts, one branch at a time.

  • Major CEX listings (we're in no rush)
  • Real-world sloth conservation initiatives funded
  • Annual SLOTHANA Slow Movement Conference
4
Phase 4

"The trees that are slow to grow bear the best fruit." - Molière

Join The Slowest Community

Where taking it slow is not just encouraged, it's required.

Become a $SLOTHANA Ambassador

Our ambassador program moves at sloth speed, but the benefits are worth the wait. Share the sloth wisdom with your community and earn exclusive rewards.

  • Early access to new meditation techniques
  • Limited edition Sloth NFTs that grow slower but more valuable
  • Direct access to the Sloth Council (our team)
Apply Now (Response in 3-5 business days)
Sloth Ambassador
Ambassador Badge

The Sloth Council

Team Member 1

Slow Sam

Chief Napping Officer

Former high-frequency trader who found enlightenment in the way of the sloth.

Team Member 2

Leisure Lisa

Meditation Director

Certified yoga instructor who specializes in extremely slow-motion stretches.

Team Member 3

Tranquil Tom

Blockchain Architsloth

Solana developer who writes code so clean it takes him twice as long as everyone else.

Team Member 4

Mellow Maria

Community Manager

Former day trader who now responds to all messages exactly 3 hours after receiving them.

Frequently Asked (Slowly)

We'll answer your questions, just give us a minute... or ten.

What makes SLOTHANA different from other meme coins?

While other meme coins rush to pump and dump, SLOTHANA encourages a slow, peaceful approach to crypto investing. We're less concerned with quick profits and more focused on building a sustainable community of like-minded individuals who appreciate the value of patience.

Is the team doxxed?

Our team members have revealed their identities... very slowly. Each week, we reveal one more pixel of our faces. At this rate, we'll be fully doxxed by 2026. However, our qualifications and experience are fully transparent, and we've all passed background checks.

When will SLOTHANA be listed on major exchanges?

In true sloth fashion, we're in no rush. Major exchange listings will happen when the time is right. We're focused on organic growth rather than artificial pumps. That said, we are in slow but steady conversations with several tier-1 exchanges.

What is the "3-second nap" you keep mentioning?

The 3-second nap is our community's mindfulness practice. Before making any trading decision, we encourage members to close their eyes for just 3 seconds. This tiny break helps prevent impulsive choices and aligns with our sloth philosophy. Try it next time before you click "buy" or "sell"!

How can I contribute to SLOTHANA?

We welcome all forms of slow contribution! Join our Discord and Telegram communities, participate in meditation sessions, create sloth memes, or apply for our ambassador program. Additionally, 5% of our token supply is allocated to real-world sloth conservation efforts.

Cookie sloth We use cookies, but very slowly. They might load by tomorrow.